I can be somewhat passionate about topical “issues,” but don’t really like to argue about politics. I’m opinionated, but I’m non-confrontational. And a little bit lazy. It’s a great combo.
I can’t remember when (if ever) I’ve had a constructive discussion about politics with someone who had a vastly different political persuasion. In many cases, political discourse is now just about rooting for your team and demonizing the other side. What’s the point of having an intelligent discussion when you can spit venom! And hurl insults! And be outraged! I hate the Yankees! Complete! Utter! Bastards!
So part of the appeal of moving to Portland was the forward-thinking mentality. So while I won’t get in anyone’s face about politics, I absolutely take gleeful delight in other people who will.
“Finish Your Beer, There’s Sober Kids in India.” Obviously pro-United Nations. Also, “Be Green.” They sent away for that bumper sticker from a package of cheese and macaroni. Don’t EVEN question why I might know that. I KNOW my mac and cheese.
This person is obviously a Tree Hugging Dirt Worshipper.
“Keep Your Rosaries Out of My Ovaries,” and also, blatantly advocating a pro-sex agenda: “Wanna Snuggle?” Shameful.
Portland is infested with Subarus. Further, this person obviously has anger issues and needs to focus.
“Proud to be Everything the Right Wing Hates,” and “Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both,” by some guy named Ben Franklin. Whatever! Heard he was a cad and a letch! Also, “Future Canadian” and “American by Birth, Tattooed by Choice.” Hippie.
This isn’t to say we don’t also have right-wing nutjobs here in the pacific northwest.
“I Prefer God, Gold and Guns to Big Government.” Huh! We all know that God hates big government! And He sure does like guns! And didn’t Jesus say whomever collects the most gold wins? It’s in the bible. Look it up.
This person just dispensed with the whole bumper sticker idea and mounted a sandwich board to their Chrysler.
Wha…? After all that trouble of building the sign, and adding it to your car, and suffering decreased fuel efficiency due to wind resistance, you’re not going to even be coherent?
I must add that the last two photos were both from Washington, not Oregon. (It’s full of yahoos up there.)
Meredith
on Jul 1st, 2008
@ 10:11 AM:
Wow! Is the air thinner up there? I just wish people would at least recycle down here, apparently that is a lot to ask for.
Steve
on Jul 1st, 2008
@ 12:57 PM:
I’ve never felt strongly enough about anything to put a bumper sticker on my car. I’ve come closest with an “I don’t brake for Daleks” Doctor Who sticker but I just can’t bring myself to stick it on the car.
Diane
on Jul 1st, 2008
@ 1:15 PM:
Thank goodness you added that last sentence (and I kept reading) – I was starting to sputter, that’s nnnnoooootttt Oregonnnnnnn. Those people in WA are nuts.
sean
on Jul 1st, 2008
@ 4:55 PM:
Diabolical — that seemingly ill-conceived car sign is merely designed to look like it was created by a half-witted moron… but I believe it is a fiendishly designed anagram.
Brilliant — because no internet anagram-solver has the power to process all 83 letters (excluding the ampersand) (including the superfluous “e” in ‘judgements’). Only an immortal, evil-faith-killing god could create such an elaborate puzzle! One that only this prophet’s fellow Chosen People Who Mount Entire Church Signs On Their Trunks And Then Apparently Glue The Letters On can decipher.
I did find a clue, though. I took the opening and closing sentence fragments (the closest thing to a sentence he could muster, the sly devil) and solved at least a portion of their secret message. Behold:
“See, Ed? I like bondage. MILK JUGS!!”
Chilling in its sinister undertones.
Heather
on Jul 1st, 2008
@ 7:58 PM:
Sean, I give you about 13 years until you start strapping signs to your car.
Stretch Mark Mama
on Jul 1st, 2008
@ 9:00 PM:
The bumper stickers are one of my favorite things about Portland. Esp since I just moved from the conservative midwest. Lots of new (hilarious) stuff.
Rosebuds for 7/02/08
on Jul 2nd, 2008
@ 6:32 AM:
[...] What is it with (non-carfree) Portlanders and bumper stickers? [...]
sean
on Jul 2nd, 2008
@ 5:15 PM:
Crap, I don’t see one for car signs…
http://www.churchsigngenerator.com/
Milk jugs!
kelli
on Jul 5th, 2008
@ 1:03 AM:
i have my opinions plastered ALL OVER my truck! i come out of the supermarket to find people standing behind my car either laughing or looking puzzled. most people don’t get the “coexist” sticker. i have had one person say “you ain’t from around here, are yew?”. by far the most popular (when it was on my Bug) was “practice abstinence. no bush. no dick. 2004″. I LOVE bumperstickers.
kelli
on Jul 5th, 2008
@ 1:04 AM:
and one i recently photographed;
“nixon: no longer the worst president ever.” ya gotta love the vocal left =)